Break Free from
Relationship Conformity
Have you been curious about polyamory or having an open relationship…
But feel too ashamed to ask about it, and don’t know where to look?
Maybe you’re on the outside looking in, and just want to learn more…
Or you’ve tried Ethical Non-Monogamy before, but it didn’t work out…
You are NOT alone—and you’ve landed on the right place!
Break Free from
Relationship Conformity
Have you been curious about polyamory or having an open relationship…
But feel too ashamed to ask about it, and don’t know where to look?
Maybe you’re on the outside looking in, and just want to learn more…
Or you’ve tried ENM before, but it didn’t work out…
You are NOT alone—and you’ve landed on the right place!
Break Free from Relationship Conformity
Have you been curious about polyamory or having an open relationship…
But feel too ashamed to ask about it, and don’t know where to look?
Maybe you’re on the outside looking in, and just want to learn more…
Or you’ve tried Ethical Non-Monogamy before, but it didn’t work out…
You are NOT alone—and you’ve landed on the right place!
This is your SAFE space.
Whether you are...
Simply curious about different ways of relating outside of monogamy
A newbie starting to dabble and explore ENM
Having more trouble maintaining your ENM relationships
More experienced folx who've had or are in established ENM relationships
By working with me, you'll..
Understand what ENM is and what it isn't and avoid the major landmines
Learn how it can be done without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships
Be able to honestly and confidently ask your partner for a consensual open relationship
Gain the skills needed to feel more successful navigating your current ENM relationships
This is your SAFE space.
Whether you are...
Simply curious about different ways of relating outside of monogamy
A newbie starting to dabble and explore Ethical Non-Monogamy
Having more trouble maintaining your Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
More experienced folx who've had or are in established Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
By working with me, you'll..
Understand what Ethical Non-Monogamy is and what it isn't and avoid the major landmines
Learn how it can be done without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships
Be able to honestly and confidently ask your partner for a consensual open relationship
Gain the skills needed to feel more successful navigating your current Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
This is your SAFE space.
Whether you are...
Simply curious about different ways of relating outside of monogamy
A newbie starting to dabble and explore Ethical Non-Monogamy
Having more trouble maintaining your Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
More experienced folx who've had or are in established Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
By working with me, you'll..
Understand what Ethical Non-Monogamy is and what it isn't and avoid the major landmines
Learn how it can be done without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships
Be able to honestly and confidently ask your partner for a consensual open relationship
Gain the skills needed to feel more successful navigating your current Ethical Non-Monogamy relationships
CERTIFIED CLINICAL SEXUALITY COACH
DR. RACHAEL MEIR
(she/her/hers)
Hi there! I am Dr. Rachael Meir,
your DEFY Relationship Clini-Coach®!
I am a licensed Clinical Psychologist and a Certified Clinical Sexuality Coach with over 15 years of experience in the field. I earned my PsyD (Doctorate of Psychology) from the PGSP-Stanford PsyD Consortium and BA from the University of Colorado, Boulder.
I am sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, BDSM/kink aware and I specialize in ethical/consensual non-monogamy, including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other unconventional or alternative relationships and lifestyles.
My extensive experience working with a wide range of clients and presenting issues has given me a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by those who live outside the bounds of heteronormative sexual orientations and monogamous relationship structures.
As a bisexual woman living in a polyamorous triad relationship myself, I am dedicated to helping individuals and couples navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and successfully sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships. I offer both individual and group coaching options to help my clients learn the necessary skills to overcome their insecurities and create secure and healthy relationships.
CERTIFIED CLINICAL SEXUALITY COACH
DR. RACHAEL MEIR
(she/her/hers)
Hi there! I am Dr. Rachael Meir,
your Defy Relationship Conformity Clini-Coach®!
I am a licensed Clinical Psychologist and a Certified Clinical Sexuality Coach with over 15 years of experience in the field. I earned my PsyD (Doctorate of Psychology) from the PGSP-Stanford PsyD Consortium and BA from the University of Colorado, Boulder.
I am sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, BDSM/kink aware and I specialize in ethical/consensual non-monogamy, including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other unconventional or alternative relationships and lifestyles.
My extensive experience working with a wide range of clients and presenting issues has given me a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by those who live outside the bounds of heteronormative sexual orientations and monogamous relationship structures.
As a bisexual woman living in a polyamorous triad relationship myself, I am dedicated to helping individuals and couples navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and successfully sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships. I offer both individual and group coaching options to help my clients learn the necessary skills to overcome their insecurities and create secure and healthy relationships.
CERTIFIED CLINICAL SEXUALITY COACH
DR. RACHAEL MEIR
(she/her/hers)
Hi there! I am Dr. Rachael Meir,
your Defy Relationship Conformity Clini-Coach®!
I am a licensed Clinical Psychologist and a Certified Clinical Sexuality Coach with over 15 years of experience in the field. I earned my PsyD (Doctorate of Psychology) from the PGSP-Stanford PsyD Consortium and BA from the University of Colorado, Boulder.
I am sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, BDSM/kink aware and I specialize in ethical/consensual non-monogamy, including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other unconventional or alternative relationships and lifestyles.
My extensive experience working with a wide range of clients and presenting issues has given me a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by those who live outside the bounds of heteronormative sexual orientations and monogamous relationship structures.
As a bisexual woman living in a polyamorous triad relationship myself, I am dedicated to helping individuals and couples navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and successfully sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships. I offer both individual and group coaching options to help my clients learn the necessary skills to overcome their insecurities and create secure and healthy relationships.
MY STORY
Just like you, I used to be curious about having a non-monogamous relationship.
I've been happily married to my husband, Aaron, for 17 years (together a total of 24 years!), but being a bisexual woman, there was something missing… and it wasn’t Aaron’s fault. It was simply because he isn’t a female, and he can’t change that. So early into our marriage, we found the swinging lifestyle which we explored for about a decade.
But that still wasn’t enough because I wanted to have a deep, emotional connection with a woman, just like I had with Aaron as a man. So 5 years ago, we intentionally sought to meet another woman with whom we could form an equitable triad. And that's when we met Kasey.
We were met with a lot of stigma. Many people thought our relationship was strange or that it promoted disloyalty. Our families were scared that someone was running off with another, and leaving someone behind to get hurt.
But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Dr. Moors, co-chair of Committee of Consensual Non-Monogamy with the American Psychological Association, says that "Consensually non-monogamous relationships have really satisfying and committed and trusting relationships"—and we totally agree. We are happy, in love, and communicating better than ever!
And the truth is, non-monogamy isn’t even that uncommon. Many just prefer to be private about it because we often face discrimination and judgment. Or worse, consequences related to employment, child custody, or housing.
In fact, Ethical Non-Monogamy is the ideal relationship style for a third of Americans.
I wasn’t always sure whether non-monogamy was right for me. But I’m so glad I found the courage to defy conformity, because I’ve found nothing but happiness.
So if you are ready to pursue an ethically non-monogamous relationship without fear, judgment, and jealousy…
Or would like to simply explore what it is all about, I am the perfect coach for you!
MY STORY
Just like you, I used to be curious about having a non-monogamous relationship.
I've been happily married to my husband, Aaron, for 17 years (together a total of 24 years!), but being a bisexual woman, there was something missing… and it wasn’t Aaron’s fault. It was simply because he isn’t a female, and he can’t change that. So early into our marriage, we found the swinging lifestyle which we explored for about a decade.
But that still wasn’t enough because I wanted to have a deep, emotional connection with a woman, just like I had with Aaron as a man. So 5 years ago, we intentionally sought to meet another woman with whom we could form an equitable triad. And that's when we met Kasey.
We were met with a lot of stigma. Many people thought our relationship was strange or that it promoted disloyalty. Our families were scared that someone was running off with another, and leaving someone behind to get hurt.
But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Dr. Moors, co-chair of Committee of Consensual Non-Monogamy with the American Psychological Association, says that "Consensually non-monogamous relationships have really satisfying and committed and trusting relationships"—and we totally agree. We are happy, in love, and communicating better than ever!
And the truth is, non-monogamy isn’t even that uncommon. Many just prefer to be private about it because we often face discrimination and judgment. Or worse, consequences related to employment, child custody, or housing.
In fact, ENM is the ideal relationship style for a third of Americans.
I wasn’t always sure whether non-monogamy was right for me. But I’m so glad I found the courage to defy conformity, because I’ve found nothing but happiness.
So if you are ready to pursue an ethically non-monogamous relationship without fear, judgment, and jealousy…
Or would like to simply explore what it is all about, I am the perfect coach for you!
MY STORY
Just like you, I used to be curious about having a non-monogamous relationship.
I've been happily married to my husband, Aaron, for 17 years (together a total of 24 years!), but being a bisexual woman, there was something missing… and it wasn’t Aaron’s fault. It was simply because he isn’t a female, and he can’t change that. So early into our marriage, we found the swinging lifestyle which we explored for about a decade.
But that still wasn’t enough because I wanted to have a deep, emotional connection with a woman, just like I had with Aaron as a man. So 5 years ago, we intentionally sought to meet another woman with whom we could form an equitable triad. And that's when we met Kasey.
We were met with a lot of stigma. Many people thought our relationship was strange or that it promoted disloyalty. Our families were scared that someone was running off with another, and leaving someone behind to get hurt.
But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Dr. Moors, co-chair of Committee of Consensual Non-Monogamy with the American Psychological Association, says that "Consensually non-monogamous relationships have really satisfying and committed and trusting relationships"—and we totally agree. We are happy, in love, and communicating better than ever!
And the truth is, non-monogamy isn’t even that uncommon. Many just prefer to be private about it because we often face discrimination and judgment. Or worse, consequences related to employment, child custody, or housing.
In fact, Ethical Non-Monogamy is the ideal relationship style for a third of Americans.
I wasn’t always sure whether non-monogamy was right for me. But I’m so glad I found the courage to defy conformity, because I’ve found nothing but happiness.
So if you are ready to pursue an ethically non-monogamous relationship without fear, judgment, and jealousy…
Or would like to simply explore what it is all about, I am the perfect coach for you!
Let's Get STARTED
Here's a FREE VIDEO for you!
Let's Get STARTED
Here's a FREE VIDEO for you!
Let's Get STARTED
Here's a FREE VIDEO for you!
Becoming non-monogamous in an ethical, consensual way is POSSIBLE!
By watching this video, you will learn…
What Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is all about
5 questions to ask yourself to determine if Ethical Non-Monogamy could be right for you
Discover the #1 thing holding you back
Becoming non-monogamous in an ethical, consensual way is POSSIBLE!
By watching this video, you will learn…
What ethical non-monogamy (ENM) is all about
5 questions to ask yourself to determine if ENM could be right for you
Discover the #1 thing holding you back
Becoming non-monogamous in an ethical, consensual way is POSSIBLE!
By watching this video, you will learn…
What Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is all about
5 questions to ask yourself to determine if Ethical Non-Monogamy could be right for you
Discover the #1 thing holding you back
Are You Ready to DEFY Relationship Conformity?
One-on-one and/or group coaching designed to help you explore Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM)
without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships.
A safe space to break free from relationship norms.
A complete guide to learning the skills necessary to SUCCESSFULLY navigate multiple relationships.
Are You Ready to DEFY Relationship Conformity?
One-on-one and/or group coaching designed to help you explore ethical non-monogamy (ENM)
without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships.
A safe space to break free from relationship norms.
A complete guide to learning the skills necessary to SUCCESSFULLY navigate multiple relationships.
Are You Ready to DEFY™️
Relationship Conformity?
One-on-one and/or group coaching designed to help you explore Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM)
without the fear of judgment, jealousy, or damaged relationships.
A safe space to break free from relationship norms.
A complete guide to learning the skills necessary to SUCCESSFULLY navigate multiple relationships.
Why Work With ME
I understand how scary and confusing it can be to defy the heteronormative/mono-normative relationship norms. Years ago, I was in the same exact position as you are now. But with the combination of my clinical and educational expertise, along with some enlightening personal experiences, I’ve been able to navigate being in an ethical triad, and now I want to help others defy relationship conformity!
By working with me, you will be guided by a clinically-trained coach who knows first-hand the challenges of unconventional lifestyles and relationships.
I am a completely open book. You can feel safe telling me literally anything!
I am easy-going, friendly, non-judgmental, caring, compassionate, supportive, and FUN!
I have both the expertise and experience to make me the perfect coach for helping others navigate their own Ethical Non-Monogamy challenges!
I offer FREE Discovery Calls via video conferencing to see if we’re a good fit!
Why Work With ME
I understand how scary and confusing it can be to defy the heteronormative/mono-normative relationship norms. Years ago, I was in the same exact position as you are now. But with the combination of my clinical and educational expertise, along with some enlightening personal experiences, I’ve been able to navigate being in an ethical triad, and now I want to help others defy relationship conformity!
By working with me, you will be guided by a clinically-trained coach who knows first-hand the challenges of unconventional lifestyles and relationships.
I am a completely open book. You can feel safe telling me literally anything!
I am easy-going, friendly, non-judgmental, caring, compassionate, supportive, and FUN!
I have both the expertise and experience to make me the perfect coach for helping others navigate their own ENM challenges!
I offer FREE Discovery Calls via video conferencing to see if we’re a good fit!
Why Work With ME
I understand how scary and confusing it can be to defy the heteronormative/mono-normative relationship norms. Years ago, I was in the same exact position as you are now. But with the combination of my clinical and educational expertise, along with some enlightening personal experiences, I’ve been able to navigate being in an ethical triad, and now I want to help others defy relationship conformity!
By working with me, you will be guided by a clinically-trained coach who knows first-hand the challenges of unconventional lifestyles and relationships.
I am a completely open book. You can feel safe telling me literally anything!
I am easy-going, friendly, non-judgmental, caring, compassionate, supportive, and FUN!
I have both the expertise and experience to make me the perfect coach for helping others navigate their own Ethical Non-Monogamy challenges!
I offer FREE Discovery Calls via video conferencing to see if we’re a good fit!
Discover The DEFY™ Method
Your Road Map for Authentic Non-Monogamy
Are you longing to BREAK FREE from relationship conformity and explore Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) with absolute confidence?
I've been exactly where you are, and I know how overwhelming it can feel. That's why I've created The DEFY™ Method– a comprehensive course designed to guide you through your Ethical Non-Monogamy journey, whether you're just curious or already navigating multiple relationships.
Drawing from my experiences as a psychologist, certified sexuality coach, and someone living a fulfilling polyamorous life, I've distilled everything I've learned into four powerful modules. Through engaging video lessons, practical exercises, and supportive resources, you'll learn to communicate effectively, manage jealousy, set healthy boundaries, and create relationships that truly align with your desires – all without fear of judgment or damaged connections.
Discover The DEFY™ Method
Your Road Map for Authentic Non-Monogamy
Are you longing to BREAK FREE from relationship conformity and explore Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) with absolute confidence?
I've been exactly where you are, and I know how overwhelming it can feel. That's why I've created The DEFY™ Method – a comprehensive course designed to guide you through your Ethical Non-Monogamy journey, whether you're just curious or already navigating multiple relationships.
Drawing from my experiences as a psychologist, certified sexuality coach, and someone living a fulfilling polyamorous life, I've distilled everything I've learned into four powerful modules. Through engaging video lessons, practical exercises, and supportive resources, you'll learn to communicate effectively, manage jealousy, set healthy boundaries, and create relationships that truly align with your desires – all without fear of judgment or damaged connections.
READY TO DEFY™️ RELATIONSHIP NORMS AND DISCOVER A MORE AUTHENTIC WAY OF LOVING?
Whether you prefer self-paced study or want more personalized support, I have options to fit your needs. Let's work together to create the love life you've always dreamed of – one that's true to you!.
READY TO DEFY RELATIONSHIP NORMS AND DISCOVER A MORE AUTHENTIC WAY OF LOVING?
Whether you prefer self-paced study or want more personalized support, I have options to fit your needs. Let's work together to create the love life you've always dreamed of – one that's true to you!.
Your FREE GUIDE
I understand how scary and confusing it can be to defy the heteronormative/mono-normative relationship norms. Years ago, I was in the same exact position as you are now. But with the combination of my clinical and educational expertise, along with some enlightening personal experiences, I’ve been able to navigate being in an ethical triad, and now I want to help others defy relationship conformity!
By working with me, you will be guided by a clinically-trained coach who knows first-hand the challenges of unconventional lifestyles and relationships.
Your one-stop-shop for the latest and greatest Ethical Non-Monogamy resources.
Books, podcasts, websites, online communities and dating apps to support your Ethical Non-Monogamy journey!
Your FREE GUIDE
I understand how scary and confusing it can be to defy the heteronormative/mono-normative relationship norms. Years ago, I was in the same exact position as you are now. But with the combination of my clinical and educational expertise, along with some enlightening personal experiences, I’ve been able to navigate being in an ethical triad, and now I want to help others defy relationship conformity!
By working with me, you will be guided by a clinically-trained coach who knows first-hand the challenges of unconventional lifestyles and relationships.
Your one-stop-shop for the latest and greatest resources.
Books, podcasts, websites, online communities and dating apps to support your Ethical Non-Monogamy journey!
Exclusive Interview With Dr. Rachael Meir
Rewriting The
RULES Of LOVE
Dr. Rachael Meir is a Stanford-trained psychologist and DEFY Relationship Conformity Clini-Coach® who specializes in ethical/consensual non-monogamy (including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other alternative lifestyles) and is sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, and BDSM/kink aware.
As a bisexual woman in a polyamorous triad relationship herself, Dr. Meir is dedicated to helping individuals navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships.
With extensive experience working with a wide range of clients, she has a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by those living outside the bounds of heteronormative sexual orientations and monogamous relationship structures. She offers individual and group coaching to help clients learn the necessary skills to create secure and healthy relationships that work best for them.
Exclusive Interview With Dr. Rachael Meir
Rewriting The
RULES Of LOVE
Dr. Rachael Meir is a Stanford-trained psychologist and Defy Relationship Conformity Clini-Coach® who specializes in ethical/consensual non-monogamy (including swinging, open relationships, polyamory, and other alternative lifestyles) and is sex-positive, LGBTQIA+ affirming, and BDSM/kink aware.
As a bisexual woman in a polyamorous triad relationship herself, Dr. Meir is dedicated to helping individuals navigate the challenges of opening their relationships and sustaining multiple sexual and romantic partnerships.
With extensive experience working with a wide range of clients, she has a deep understanding of the unique challenges faced by those living outside the bounds of heteronormative sexual orientations and monogamous relationship structures. She offers individual and group coaching to help clients learn the necessary skills to create secure and healthy relationships that work best for them.
Join The Dr. Meir DEFY Community
Wanna dip your toe in the waters beyond the office? Sign Up to our newsletter for exciting articles and exclusives.
Join The Dr. Meir DEFY
Community
Wanna dip your toe in the waters beyond the office? Sign Up to our newsletter for exciting articles and exclusives.
BONUS Content
PRO Tips on Consensually
Non-Monogamous Relationships
Honesty and transparency are VITAL
Be open to your partners about how you feel, as well as your boundaries, limits, and expectations. It also helps to set aside some scheduled check-ins to stay aligned with your own needs and wants, which can change over time.
Be READY for the ups and downs
Ethical Non-Monogamy can be exciting and fulfilling, but like all relationships, there will be challenges. Hey, nobody said it would be easy. You need to be prepared for jealousy, insecurity, doubt, and worry - all of which are completely normal - and learn to navigate it with your partners.
Consider your partners
The trick to making Ethical Non-Monogamy work is communication and empathy. When you make major decisions, talk to all your partners about it. Ask for their thoughts and feelings regularly, be understanding when their needs or wants clash with yours, and be willing to come to a compromise.
Understand that all relationships look different
While there are things you should always do in Ethical Non-Monogamy, like be open and honest and never lie or coerce anyone, it’s still an agreement between you and your partners. It’s up to you to talk and figure out what you want your dynamics to look like.
BONUS Content
PRO Tips on Consensually
Non-Monogamous Relationships
Honesty and transparency are VITAL
Be open to your partners about how you feel, as well as your boundaries, limits, and expectations. It also helps to set aside some scheduled check-ins to stay aligned with your own needs and wants, which can change over time.
Be READY for the ups and downs
Ethical Non-Monogamy can be exciting and fulfilling, but like all relationships, there will be challenges. Hey, nobody said it would be easy. You need to be prepared for jealousy, insecurity, doubt, and worry - all of which are completely normal - and learn to navigate it with your partners.
Consider your partners
The trick to making Ethical Non-Monogamy work is communication and empathy. When you make major decisions, talk to all your partners about it. Ask for their thoughts and feelings regularly, be understanding when their needs or wants clash with yours, and be willing to come to a compromise.
Understand that all relationships look different
While there are things you should always do in Ethical Non-Monogamy, like be open and honest and never lie or coerce anyone, it’s still an agreement between you and your partners. It’s up to you to talk and figure out what you want your dynamics to look like.